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2.9 “Blackwater”
Written by George
R.R. Martin
Directed by Neil
Marshall
Commentary by George
R.R. Martin
Commentary by Peter
Dinklage (Tyrion Lannister), Lena Headey (Cersei Lannister), Neil Marshall
Full disclosure: “Blackwater” is one of my favorite
episodes. Martin did such a great job of adapting these six or so chapters,
keeping the point-of-view swaps, the sense of dread as everyone battens down
the hatches, and then the battle itself. Given the budgetary constrictions the
show is under, the battle comes out looking really good.
The episode can be broken down into a few major beats: the
buildup, the initial contact, the certainty of defeat, and the victory.
Everyone has something going on during each of these beats—except Davos, who
gets blown off his ship as soon as the initial contact is made and isn’t seen
again.
The Buildup
Everyone is terrified (except maybe Stannis). Tyrion knows
if his plan fails, he’ll be one of the first nobles to die, whether he’s
anywhere near the battle or not. Stannis will systematically murder every
Lannister he can get his hands on. Shae tries to comfort him, telling him that
she’ll defend him, and he tells her she “can’t fuck [her] way out of
everything.” She says it’s worked pretty well so far. Cersei’s getting drunk
and collecting a vial of poison from Pycelle, who keeps trying to get back into
her confidence and keeps failing. Davos is nervous about entering open battle,
given that his entire background has been in smuggling. His son, Mathos, tells
him that R’hllor is watching over them, and Davos shakes off some of his nerves
by getting in a philosophical debate.
Meanwhile, we finally get to hear the lyrics to “The Rains
of Castamere” because Bronn is singing it with a bunch of his gold cloaks while
they all get really drunk at a brothel. Bronn has a girl sitting on his lap,
and while she’s fully clothed, Peter Dinklage says (in the commentary) exactly
what we’re all thinking: she’s not going to be clothed for long. Indeed, Bronn
proceeds to stand her up, peel the clothes off of her, and pull her back down
into his lap just before Sandor and one of his men come in. Bronn makes
overtures, but Sandor’s not having any of it. And just before they throw down,
the bells start to ring.
It’s probably no surprise to anyone that this particular
scene is not a Martin invention. He makes a point to acknowledge that this
scene doesn’t appear in the books (because none of his viewpoint characters are
involved) and he didn’t write it—it was a Benioff and Weiss addition. Which, of
course it is; it involves a woman naked for no good reason.
The bells announce that Stannis’ ships have been sighted,
and the low-grade panic kicks into high gear. Varys stares worriedly out a
window as Podrick buckles Tyrion into his armor (and Tyrion once again
insinuates that Varys has a thing for little boys). Everyone says their
goodbyes—Tyrion and Bronn have a great little moment. Sansa tells Tyrion she
will pray for his safe return, “just as I pray for the king’s.” (Sansa’s subtle
snark game is on point in this
scene.)
Joffrey shows up and demands Sansa’s immediate attention, leaving
Tyrion and Shae to say their goodbyes. Sansa continues to exercise her slowly
developing political savvy by insinuating that because Joffrey doesn’t plan to
go outside the gates and fight in the vanguard that he’s less of a man than her
brother Robb, “and he’s just a pretender.” I’m really glad that Martin got to
put this bit of character development in, since the other writers seem so
intent on defining Sansa as a victim rather than a burgeoning player in the
game of thrones. Here, she manages to ruin Joffrey’s attempt at acting out a
chivalric romance—in true Joffrey style, making Sansa kiss his sword and
telling her that when he comes back she’ll kiss it again “and taste my uncle’s
blood.” He’s trying so hard to simultaneously live up to both kinds of pressure
on men in this society—chivalry and violent masculinity. The violence comes
more easily to him, but he knows that the level of violence he wants to commit
and see done isn’t socially acceptable, so he hides behind the grand gestures
of chivalry (he’s just not very good at it).
The Initial Contact
Davos decides to answer the bells of the city with drums,
and the pace—and heartbeat, if you will—of the episode picks up. Tyrion,
Joffrey, Sandor, and Lancel are on the walls, and Tyrion’s adrenaline is up,
but Lancel and Joffrey are panicking. Stannis’ fleet has come into view and
only one of Joffrey’s ships is anywhere to be seen—drifting aimlessly in the
general direction of Stannis’ fleet. We get a wonderful exchange between the
four men in which Joffrey acts childish and Tyrion doubles-down on his
childishness then reminds him that he’s the one who has the plan, so Joffrey
needs to sit down and shut up.
This is where the cinematography gets amazing. We hardly see
the direwolves or dragons this season, and this is why: they’ve spent their
entire CGI budget on this explosion right here:
RIP Mathos, and we’ll see you later, Davos.
Stannis says “screw it” and tells the remainder of the fleet
to land so they can start fighting at the gates. First contact has been made,
and now it’s chaos.
The Certainty of
Defeat
While the sense of dread leaves the battlefield and gives
way to outright terror, that sense of dread hangs in the air inside Maegor’s
Holdfast, where Cersei is “protecting” the women of the keep. Hats off to Lena
Headey for her acting in this episode because it is amazing. Also, she’s rocking this hilarious little breastplate:
Cersei sits Sansa down and proceeds to tell her all about
how sieges work, how if Stannis wins, the women here can expect to be raped,
and what a good thing it is that Sansa’s still on her period, because at least
when she’s raped, she won’t get pregnant. (Classy.) The Maegor’s scenes contrast
beautifully with the battle scenes, which are chaotic and switch from POV to
POV quickly, giving us a good overall look at what’s happening. Meanwhile,
everything’s calm, if a bit tense, in the Holdfast, until Cersei leaves. Almost
all of Cersei’s dialogue is directly from the books, and Headey delivers it
wonderfully. Her rants are frequently interrupted by people coming in to tell
her how badly the battle’s going, until she orders Joffrey brought back in
(against Lancel’s emphatic advice) and quits the holdfast herself. This leaves
Sansa to exercise the other part of her newfound political savvy: making
herself the strong center of the court by helping to calm the women and taking
their minds off the bad news and Cersei’s abrupt departure. Once they’re
calmed, however, Sansa also leaves so that if things go as badly as it looks
like they’re going, Shae doesn’t want Ilyn to have easy access to her to kill
her.
Outside the gates, everything is chaos. Everything’s on
fire. Nobody’s wearing their helmets (90% of the reason to watch Martin’s
commentary on this episode is his continuing diatribe about nobody wearing
their helmets and that being a really good way to get killed. Look at that dude
next to Stannis who got his head caved in with a rock. If he’d been wearing his
helmet, that wouldn’t have happened). Sandor’s freaking out because of the
fire; he’s extremely pyrophobic, because of course he is. He retreats back
behind the walls, and both Tyrion and Joffrey tell him to get back out there
and fight. He proceeds to tell them exactly what anatomical impossibility they
can do with the Kingsguard, the city, and the king himself, and stomp off.
This leaves nobody to go out and fight the men who have now
hauled a ram off one of the rowboats and are pounding at the Mud Gate. Tyrion
volunteers, though he has to shame the other men into going with him. He has
what is probably the best line of the episode: “Those are brave men knocking at
our door. Let’s go kill them!” Tyrion’s wearing his helmet, like a smart person,
though he takes it off sometime during the fight, which is when Ser Mandon of
the Kingsguard tries to kill him. Podrick kills Mandon, instead, but Tyrion’s
wounded and woozy, and defeat seems certain.
Sansa discovers Sandor in her room, and he tries again to
tell her how horrible people are, men in particular, and knights in
particularly particular. She stares him down and tells him he won’t hurt her,
and he agrees that he won’t. He offers to take her back to Winterfell, and she
decides she’s safer here. I actually like the shift in the vibe we get between
these two; in the books, it’s kind of sexual and kind of squicky, but here he
just seems like he’s protecting a lost and abused young girl. I think it comes
off that way in the books because men in the books are socialized to interact
with things either by killing them or having sex with them, and Sandor doesn’t
know what to do with how he feels about Sansa. He doesn’t have any kids, so he
wouldn’t have a fatherly frame of reference. It’s squicky, but it’s kind of
understandable if you dig a bit into the toxic masculinity of the society and
how that psychologically affects men like Sandor. The show doesn’t have time,
space, or inclination for that kind of nuance, so it’s good they avoided it at
all.
Cersei is also preparing for defeat, taking Tommen to the
throne room, sitting on the throne with him, and telling him a story while
preparing to feed him the poison she got from Pycelle.
Huh?
Martin mentions that he had trouble with this scene and the
dialogue in it was ultimately rewritten by Benioff and Weiss. My theory (if I
may be so bold as to speculate) is that Martin couldn’t write it because this
makes no sense with regard to Cersei’s
character. Cersei isn’t Medea. Cersei defends her children and their lives with
a mama-bear (or mama-lion) viciousness that leads her to sometimes do really
stupid things. Killing one of them—even to save them—does not in any way line
up with Cersei’s character as we’ve seen it so far. It makes for some good
dramatic tension, but doesn’t work for character consistency (which, let’s be
honest, Benioff and Weiss haven’t ever been particularly concerned about).
Victory
This bit lasts a total of maybe two minutes. Overlaid with
Storytime with Cersei (and Some Poison) is Tyrion’s shaky view of Renly and his
host riding in and slaughtering Stannis’ men. He’s obviously confused, since
Renly is dead, but he’s pretty sure he’s about to be dead, too. Stannis, on top
of the wall, starts screaming at his men, who break and run, to stand and
fight. He’s hauled off by two of his own men; the battle is definitively lost.
And then “Renly” busts through the doors of the throne room
and removes his helmet to reveal Loras Tyrell, and behind him is Tywin
Lannister, who declares the battle won, preventing Cersei from killing her
youngest son.
RIP:
Mathos Seaworth
Ser Mandon Moore
So many soldiers
Next week: The House of the Undying. Robb is incredibly stupid. Theon loses everything.
Next week: The House of the Undying. Robb is incredibly stupid. Theon loses everything.
Always, always good to read what you write, Shiloh.
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